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Seasons

In a world where Starbucks tries to define the seasons for us (pumpkin spice latte in August anyone?), I find myself thinking about the seasons of life often. As a society we keep adding phases, while no longer thinking simply in terms of being a child, an adult or a senior. Adolescence is a fairly new designation as we recognize the challenges associated with that age group. And booksellers are advertising a genre called New Adult Fiction, aimed at 18-29 year olds, which are books with stories about the trials of becoming an adult. It is projected that about half of all babies born today will live to be close to a hundred years old. How will we define the years after sixty then?

In Barry Martin’s book Under One Roof: Lessons I Learned from a Tough Old Woman in a Little Old House, he tells the true story of Edith Macefield who, at the age of 84, refused a commercial developer’s one million dollar offer to buy her home. Edith desperately wanted to define this phase in her life for herself, and not be bound by predetermined labels.

Or did she? Maybe she simply wanted to spend the rest of her life in her home. Maybe she didn’t care about defining her stage of life. Maybe she just wanted to live her life in her own way.

I invite you to decide for yourself. The book is out of print, but it is worth searching for a used copy. Let me know what you think. Have we named too many seasons of life? Or too few? As we age, do the milestones (turning thirty or fifty) matter? And how did others correctly or incorrectly think of Edith?

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Extreme Kindness in The Door to Door Bookstore by Carsten Henn

     Carl, an employee of a bookstore that still hand delivers books, has some very loyal customers that he sees almost every evening, He enters their book orders into the computer, and when the books arrive he wraps them like gifts. Then he walks through the city and delivers each one. His customers look forward to his kind service.

     Carl’s kindness extends beyond his deliveries. When the customer he refers to as “Hercules,”  a former bodybuilder, asks Carl to tell him the entire story of the books he has ordered, spoilers and all, Carl obliges. Carl has surmised Hercules’ secret, but keeps it to himself-Hercules can’t read.

     The reader may be wondering why a man who can’t read would order so many books. In the movie Driving Miss Daisy, the character named Hoke looks through the newspaper every day. He can’t read, but he can figure out what’s happening by looking at the pictures. Hercules orders books so he can hear the stories. Both of these characters have figured out a way to cope with the world of words.

     As an adult literacy teacher, I have met many people who struggle with reading and have hidden it well. Carl treats Hercules with kindness, dignity, and respect. There may be people in your community with the same secret. Let’s do the same for them, and at the same time support our local libraries and adult literacy programs. Let’s share our love of reading!

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A Case for Redemption in the Satisfaction Cafe

          When I recommended The Satisfaction Café  to my book club, a group of wonderfully intelligent and discerning readers, I was excited to share with them a well-written work that embodied the “show, don’t tell” mantra that writers are taught ad infinitum. The author allows the story to unfold by revealing the souls of the characters through what they do, say, and feel rather than just telling the reader. But some in the group wanted to know what was redeeming about it-an exceptionally good question that caused me to think beyond the quality of the writing.

          My first response was that redemption happens toward the end of the book, but I was not referring to the main character’s, Joan, decision to take her own life. That subject would take up enough space for another entire essay. Redemption comes with the opening of the café, which offers customers a listening ear with every cup of coffee sold. Joan opens the café later in life, after having been the recipient of both financial blessings and severe trauma, as well as having suffered the consequences of her own decisions.

Her parents are cruel people. While they financed her move from Tawain to study in the U.S., they make it clear that if even one of her brothers were worthy, they would never have done this for her. They are angry that they are forced to lay their hopes for the future on a daughter rather than a son, and they take it out on Joan. The ever dutiful and respectful daughter, Joan stays in contact with her parents, despite her mother constantly reminding her of what she owes them and her insistence that Joan must marry.

Joan does marry, but her decision is based on pragmatism rather than love. Her husband is abusive and wants to bring another man into their relationship. After stabbing him during a confrontation, she is shunned by her community and must start her life over.

  She later falls in love with a wealthy, older man and becomes his fourth wife. Joan is in love this time but fails to consider what being the fourth wife of a wealthy man with grown children would entail. She is financially secure, but her husband is unfaithful and her step-children make their disdain for her obvious. In addition, throughout her time in the U.S., Joan experiences racism, especially in the wealthy community she lives in with her second husband. Joan’s husband is less than thrilled when Joan becomes pregnant and when she willingly adopts their niece. When her husband becomes ill, Joan diligently cares for him, without much help from the rest of the family. When her husband dies, her stepson burns down the house Joan has inherited.

          Throughout the book, no one is listening to Joan. No one really sees her or wants to get to really know her. Joan is a very practical person, but in her heart she is saying:

Mom and Dad, don’t you love me?

Husband #1, stop hurting me!

Husband #2, stop cheating on me!

Step-children, I really do love your father! And I signed a prenup!

Her own children, grow up!

Everyone else, I am an intelligent, caring woman who just happens to have immigrated from Tawain! See me!

          Redemption comes when Joan finally takes responsibility for her own life. Joan stops depending on others for security. Instead, she takes the insurance money from her home and opens a café, despite the warnings that she was taking a significant risk that could financially ruin her. The purpose of the business, however, is not meant to make  her rich.  Its purpose is to help her reconcile the past-the hurt, the anger and, yes, her bad decisions. It is also, more importantly, for anyone who needs to be seen and heard. Not only does she create a delicious menu, she extends grace and comfort to every person entering the café by having them be listened to and cared for, even if only for a little while. Joan took all that had been her life, both good and bad, and turned it all into a legacy of hope and care.

          The two greatest commands are to love God with all of our hearts, minds, and souls, and to love others. In her own way, Joan loved others by offering them food for their bodies and help for their souls.